I’ve been wanting to tell my story about my Nemo Toe for a while on here. I don’t really know why I’ve waited so long, but here I go. I wrote this for a guest feature at Funky Faith Girl and now I’m sharing it here! Enjoy!
My Nemo Toe
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| Excuse the no toe nail polish! I was too lazy to paint them! |
I was 12 years old when I first discovered that my toe was different. I had hit a growth spurt that year & as my feet grew, my toe didn’t.
I was at the swimming pool & a little girl pointed at my left foot and said, “Dear God, what happened to your foot?!” I looked down & was mortified. I had never noticed it before. I ran home, showed my mom, we went to the doctor (ha) and all he told me was that I was missing a joint.
From then on, I swore off flip flops, I wouldn’t wear any sandals, I didn’t go barefoot, except to swim, & I would immediately jump into the pool so no one would see it. It was ugly, it was disgusting, I HATED it. I used to ask God why he gave me this stupid left foot with the stupid toe, why couldn’t I have normal, pretty feet?
The summer I was 17, I ended up working as a camp counselor at a church camp. One week there was a little boy there, Ryan, who always played all the activities with his left hand in his pocket. He never took it out, he never ate with it, he never did anything with it, it always stayed in that pocket.
One day I called him to the side during a game of tag & asked him why he wouldn’t use his left hand for anything. He shamefully pulled out his left hand and showed me that he only had 4 fingers. When he was born he didn’t have a thumb, so the doctors removed his index finger & made it a thumb when he was a few days old.
Keep in mind we are on the game field, in front of a 100 people, and I start taking off my shoe on my left foot. This kid is staring at me like I’m insane. I take off my sock. And I point right down at my weird toe. “Look Ryan, I have a weird toe. I hate it. And I hide it. If you will use your hand to play this game, then I will wear flip flops the rest of the week.”
I saw his eyes light up, he used his hand to play tag. It was the first time that week I ever saw him use it. That night, I wore flip flops to dinner. Later, during free time a group of us were sitting on the front porch of the boys’ cabin & I saw Ryan showing off his hand. He asked me to show off my foot. When I did, another camp counselor showed us his webbed toes. Another kid told us about something that embarrassed him. And it just went on like that with each kid in the group.
I learned that week, that if my toe helped only Ryan, then it was worth having that crazy toe for my whole life. I never saw him put his hand back in his pocket again that week. I never covered up my toe again out of shame and I haven’t 10 years since.
In college, my basketball teammates named it the “Nemo Toe” from the movie Finding Nemo (he has a fin that is smaller than the other one.) Today, I’m proud of my toe. Today, I know that I have it for a reason, but God made me wait 5 years to learn why.
I learned two valuable lessons that summer, “God doesn’t make mistakes” and “Time spent waiting on God is time never wasted.” I wasted a lot of time asking God “why” about that crazy toe. I don’t ask him anymore though, he gave me that toe for Ryan.
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you. Before you were born I dedicated you, a prophet to the nations I appointed you.” Jeremiah 1:5
That's awesome! Thanks for sharing that. I don't have anything cool like that, but God has sure used moments like that to teach me
Very, very cool story!
Thanks for sharing your story. Very insghtful and inspirational. We are all different and should be proud of it.
Thanks for sharing the story about you and Ryan. I truly believe you impacted that boy's confidence for life. Your kindness is inspiring. 🙂
Everyone has something they don't like about themselves, it's what makes us "us"!
I love this post, Nemo toe and all. I love it even better that you wouldn't have it any other way now!
that.” After promising serccey she set to work showing me the scheduling software, how purchases were made, how to reconcile all of those with the p-card I would soon be issued, and how to insure all the office machinery worked properly. “You may be Carlisle’s assistant, but you’ll do work for all of the executives,” she told me. “Each job might seem easy, but when you multiply it by the number of people you have to corral you’ll see that your day goes by very quickly. Some managers you have to stay on top of to get some reports from when they’re due, so I’ve written down whom they are and when you should start bugging them.”The morning whiled away quickly as she started having me edit some reports, figuring that was a good transition from my old job. Before I knew it Edward was standing against the wall, watching me. “I’m working,” I told him. “Go away and leave me alone.”“You’re a natural,” Shelly giggled, “both as an admin and a wife.”Edward just shook his head. “You don’t want any lunch?” He laughed at my surprised expression, especially when I glanced at the clock and saw it was much later than I had thought. “If you’re not hungry, that’s good, because Alice has a list of errands for us to do.” Upon hearing my groan Shelly laughed as he said, “We can eat first.”“Good,” I answered, ignoring Shelly’s chuckles. “I thought Alice had decided on the flowers anyway, what can we possibly have to look at?”“The bridal bouquet, the boutonnieres, the bridesmaids’ bouquets,” Shelly started to say, ticking them off her fingers just like Alice did.“Are you related to the Cullens?” I asked, making her laugh even harder. “Because you looked like Alice right then.”“The job of a good admin is paying attention to details, personal ones, not just work related ones,” she told me with a knowing look.“Come on, love,” Edward said, shrugging off the wall and reaching out for my hand. Turning to Shelly he added, “I’m pretty sure this will take the rest of the day, so she’ll see you tomorrow.”“It’s flowers, how long can it take?” I asked, trailing behind him as he pulled me into the elevator.He just smiled, until the elevator doors closed behind us. Finding we were alone he swiftly turned and pulled me into him with one hand while the other tilted my chin up so he could kiss me soundly, only pulling away when we felt the car slow. “That’s better,” he said, smiling at me as the doors opened on the ground floor.“What’s better?” I asked, confused.“You looked too clean, now you look thoroughly kissed. It’s sexy.” I laughed loudly at that, drawing smiles from some of our coworkers seeing us laughing and holding hands. It seemed the gossip had blown over quickly and now people were accepting that we were engaged. Noticing me notice them Edward whispered into my ear, “See? They don’t care that we’re dating. You had nothing to worry about on Friday.”“Mmhmm,” I answered, waiting until we were in his car before saying anything else. After deciding that a salad at a place next to the florist’s would be good for lunch I thought it was time to bring up something that had been at the back of my mind all day.“This morning Shelly said something about you not being able to stay away from me,” I said, looking directly at him to see his reaction. He glanced at me, looking a little guilty before his features smoothed out. “I was wondering what she meant by that.”He shrugged. “I just told her I’d been attracted to you for a while; she believed me.” I would have believed him, but the slight flush on his face and the grinding of his teeth told me he was hiding something. So I continued to stare at him and he continued to watch the road, his eyes flashing to mine occasionally.When he helped me from the car to eat lunch he kept hold of my hand, only to use it to spin me and back me up against the car. “No one we know will see us make out here,” he whispered as he lowered his lips to mine, “and I’m far more hungry for you than a salad.”My hands were against his chest as he began to kiss me, clenching in the fabric in an attempt to pull him closer. In no time I forgot why we were there and what we were supposed to be doing, but a horn sounding nearby pulled his lips from mine in time for him to catch me from fainting away. “Breathe, Bella,” he chuckled, helping me to stand. “Maybe we should go eat if you’re feeling faint?” I just shook my head, trying to right my brain, and followed him.A few hours later the food had been eaten and the flowers had been ordered. Trying to be dutiful I pulled out Alice’s list, checking off the things we’d taken care of and making note of those we still needed to attend to. “I need to renew my passport,” I said aloud in the car as we were driving to Edward’s apartment.He quickly turned a corner and pulled out his phone. “Hi Mrs. Cope,” he said, giving me a wink, “Bella needs to renew her passport, can you call and see if the post office has an appointment time open today?” We pulled up into a post office as he spoke. “We’re at the one near my house now, do you have them on the line?” I could make out her voice on the other end and chanced to look at the clock. It was almost five, so they would be closing soon. “Thanks,” he said finally, closing his phone and sticking it into his pocket as he hopped out. “There’s an opening if we’re in there in two minutes.”“But I don’t have my old one with me,” I said, hesitating.“I’ve got it in the glove box,” he said with a wink, opening the latch and retrieving the little blue folder. “I picked it up when we were helping your mom on Sunday.”“Why?” I asked, a little peeved that he had done that.“You put it on your desk, mentioning that you needed to check its expiration, and I needed it to get your name right on the tickets for our honeymoon, so I grabbed it,” he explained as he took my hand and pulled me into the lobby. Looking at the harried looking worker he said, “We have an appointment to have her passport renewed?” We were instructed down a hallway.“This goes on the list of doing things without asking,” I said. His legs were incredibly long as we raced down the hall to the office we had been instructed to enter.His face took on a speculative look, then he grimaced. “Yep, you’re right. Sorry. Can you forgive me?”“I’ll consider it,” I quipped before turning my attention to the person who obviously just wanted to go home.